Part Three: Reality
Upon our return from our honeymoon I learned that I had my first (part
time) teaching job! I had written the History Department at Florida
International University in Miami asking if they anticipated any openings in the
coming year (one of my friends at Missouri was already working in the
department so she put me in touch with the right people). Howard Rock called and asked if I would teach two upper division
history courses during the summer term. Of course, I accepted. So for six weeks in the summer of 1988 I taught
Europe, 1914-1945 to a class of twenty-five students and United States History Since
1945. Rock told me that this second class would have no more than
twenty students. Imagine how I felt -- first time teaching, you know --
walking into a
classroom of fifty-five! The classes each met twice a week, three hours per session.
So, I was writing a lecture every day just to keep up with the pace.
Each lecture took me about five hours to write and although I eventually
typed these things up and coded them into HTML at a later date, I still have
a number of hand-written lectures on yellow-lined paper. I did end
up with some pretty good lectures: most of them became foundations for lectures I've
used ever since. Overall, I did a fairly good job, considering it was the first time I had ever
had total control over a classroom. I did feel a bit uncomfortable in the role as teacher
but there were days when things really clicked.
While teaching at FIU I was contacted by Ray Mohl, the Chairman of the
History Department at Florida Atlantic University in
Boca Raton. He not only wanted me to teach as an adjunct at FAU, he wanted me to teach
three classes. So, in the Fall of 1988 I began my career as an adjunct instructor at
FAU.
I taught both sections of Western Civilization as well as an upper division
course in Modern Britain. It was rather rough going at first but after about three or four
weeks I settled down and began to develop a routine.
Only six students enrolled in the Modern Britain class. That made for some
difficult class time since it was obvious I could not lecture to them. To make matters
worse, none of them were history majors and any thoughts I had entertained of teaching the
class as a seminar were dashed because of it. (One student, an English
major, and during our discussion of an Orwell novel, told me with a straight
face that she "enjoyed" the book because "one chapter came after another.")
My western civilization classes were interesting. I very quickly realized that
there was a lot about western civilization that I simply did not know. So there began my
introduction to 6000 years of western history, something I had never studied
in graduate school. In fact, I knew nothing about western civilization and
so then and there began my search for books!
Then, in October 1988, disaster struck. My brother David was admitted to
Yale-New Haven Hospital for exploratory surgery. (At the rehearsal dinner
back in June, my parents noticed that Dave had not eaten a thing. He
complained of a sour stomach and was taking Rolaids. I think he knew what
was going on but was afraid to admit it to anyone.) As it turned out, he had
esophageal
cancer. I flew to Connecticut the day before his operation. I had to stay home with his
two children while my parents and his wife went to the hospital. I sat at
the kitchen table reading my western civilization textbook while my two
nieces chased the dog around the house." Around 11:30 in the morning my Dad
called me with the words I can still hear -- "It's bad. It's cancer. We're going to lose
him."
My brother spent nearly 50 days in the ICU at Yale and then eventually
went home to Setauket, N.Y., out on Long Island. I visited him several times at home.
While all this was happening, I was writing my dissertation. In fact, it was my brother's
illness which made me persevere and get the damn thing finished. So between April and
October 1989, I wrote 400 pages of the manuscript!
I decided that the only way I would write the damn monster (which I later
dubbed Lost Weekend) was to make a schedule and stick to it. So, I struck upon
the idea of working 7 AM to 1 PM and not a minute more. Six hours seemed to be plenty of
time and as it turned out, it was. On good days I could pump out 10-12 pages with notes.
In fact, my writing got to the point where I couldn't wait to get up the next morning in
order to write. Such a schedule was also nice because it meant that I could spend time
with my wife without having to worry about writing. It clearly meant a less stressful
situation.
However, Dave died at Yale-New Haven
Hospital on October 8th and was buried under an
ancient oak tree at the
Caroline Church in Brookhaven, N.Y. I had to deliver the
EULOGY
in front of 200 people. I retrospect, I still can't believe I was able to
hold my composure to read his eulogy. To this day I wish I had brought a
recording of The Righteous Brothers "You Lost That Lovin' Feelin'" or James
Brown's "I Got You (I Feel Good)."
Once back in Florida I was right in the middle of the semester.
The dissertation, now 92%
completed, lay dormant. When my wife Joyce went away for a week the following Spring, I
sat at my computer and finished the manuscript! Two weeks later it was in the hands of my
committee and a few weeks beyond that, I was in Columbia, Missouri defending my
dissertation, The Diffusion of an Idea: A History of Scientific Management in Britain,
1890-1945.
The defense was unremarkable. I did have a good time but it seemed the
historians on the committee were more interested in pursuing the Marx-Braverman line than
I was. I wanted to talk about Bedaux, Taylor and all the rest. They weren't interested.
The only person who did seem interested was the member of the committee who came from
outside history. He was a professor in the School of Management and he told me
that he was impressed that historians bothered with such topics of
inquiry. So impressed was he that he asked if I would write a review of a book on
scientific management for The Journal of Management. And so, I had my first
publication! Not only that -- in May 1990 I received my Ph.D.
Meanwhile, one of the problems I encountered when I started teaching was
the most obvious: I needed a cache of lectures. Well, that first semester I wrote about
twenty-five lectures. Up to 1991, when I left the
Boca Raton campus to teach at the Davie campus, I taught two dozen sections of Western
Civilization as well as upper division courses on Modern England, European/United States
Economic History and Modern European Intellectual History.
I should add that about the same time I was hired as an adjunct at the
North campus of Broward Community College in
Coconut Creek. So now I found myself teaching on two campuses -- well, actually three since
I was then teaching courses at yet another FAU campus as well. BCC was a fairly good place
to work. The pay was poor and many of my students ought to have never graduated high
school. Just the same, I developed an excellent relationship with many of them. I
continued to see many of them at FAU since they transferred there after graduation.
FAU was a great place to make a start but alas, there were never any
positions open in my field. So an adjunct I was, and an adjunct I remained until December
1996. However, in 1990, and approximately two weeks before the Fall semester began, I
received a phone call from the Chairman who asked me if I would consider a one
year-temporary position as a Visiting Assistant Professor. After all, I had just received
my doctorate in May so I jumped at the chance. My wife and I had just bought our first
house so it was an excellent opportunity. Unfortunately, the position only lasted a year.
I had a great salary, benefits, an office and I taught eight courses over two semesters.
It felt like real life. But it wasn't. It was yet another postponement of real life.
As the summer rolled around, there I was facing unemployment. There was a
chance that I could get hired at the Davie campus, as they had advertised a position in
European history. Too bad. They wanted an Iberian specialist. Well, that wasn't me. I was
told not to bother applying. Then I was asked why I hadn't applied. The next thing I knew
I was being told (by the chair) that I had a 50-50 chance of getting the job. And then I
found out that I didn't get the job and worse, that because of budget cuts I was no longer
to be used as an adjunct. Talk about blowing someone's mind! I ended up with a mild ulcer.
I wonder why!
Eventually I was sent off to the Davie campus, which used to be fondly
referred to as Purgatory by the regular faculty at FAU. The Davie campus is a nice place.
It shares its location with Broward Community College, Florida International University
and Nova-Southeastern is right around the corner. The
campus was also just a few miles from my home.
The Davie campus of FAU is a commuter campus. Some folks traveled as far
as Miami and West Palm Beach. From my own experience teaching upper division European
history, the typical student was thirty or older, married or divorced and holding down a full
time job. In other words, these were non-traditional students. I taught at night. A
wonderful experience as nearly all my students were older and, I hate to say it, more
responsible.
At Davie I taught courses in Modern Russia,
Modern England,
European Intellectual History and a
History of Socialism. I managed to make many friends
at this campus and in general, I enjoyed my experience. The history faculty is tiny: only
five or six people and no European historian.
In the Fall of 1996 I taught a class in
20th Century European History --
it was to be my last teaching assignment at FAU. The class was closed at 35
students -- the
largest enrollment I have ever had. In fact, this class had the highest enrollment of any
history class at either the Boca Raton or Davie campus! I'm proud of that. Unfortunately,
my class, Newton to Napoleon: The Experience of 18th Century Europe, was canceled due to
low enrollment. Only seven folks signed up for it. Too bad. I lost a paycheck.
1996 turned out to be our last year in south Florida. Our
house was too small and my oldest child was getting ready for kindergarten
and we weren't too crazy about our choices. 1996 was also the year that
The History Guide came into existence. Here's how it happened. I was
acting as a "helper" on some computer newsgroups and struck up a
conversation with a guy in Bangkok who was having problems with Eudora (a
mail application). We got to writing and the next thing I know is he
suggested I create a website for history. He even gave it a name -- The
History Guide. The Guide started as a way for me to deliver
information to students enrolled in one of my classes at FAU. What it has
become over the years is something quite different.
So where am I today? What am I doing? Where am I going? Good questions!
These days my historical interests are rather eclectic. I would say that I currently
research the following topics, in no apparent order: modern Russian history, Stalinism,
modernism, world war in its cultural guise, European intellectual history, Marxism and the
French Revolution. I also have an ongoing fascination with the history of heresy in the
Middle Ages! I don't know why -- it simply interests me. And of course, I find myself still
trying to find that elusive job. Why must it be so difficult?
Part Four: Reality, Again
| The History Guide | |
Copyright © 2000 Steven Kreis
Last Revised --
October 09, 2006
